Sunday, 01 February 2009
This is Colton. He’s a guinea-pig. He does stocks and shares online, and is currently horrified at the credit crunch.
He likes to watch things blow up, and seems to occasionally buy things that he probably shouldn’t be allowed to use. Such as bazookas, helicopters and the occasional off-the-radar island. My thoughts on the matter? He’s planning something.
He’s reasonable, usually; and he actually does listen to what his advisers have to say, unlike most evil guinea pigs. Did I say evil? I meant evirable. I mean, adorevil. I mean, adorable.
Max, the imp thing. He can levitate via magnets or magic or something. He told us once but we weren’t listening, and he refuses to say it again for some reason. The bright cyan pads on his feet are a bit like sponges full of ink – whenever he has to walk somewhere, a cyan liquid is squeezed out of the pads with every step, so to avoid messing up the floor he floats everywhere.
Max is a trickster by nature. He likes to set traps for people, and his favourite pastime is annoying Colton and Tumble Drier. Colton is, unfortunately, small. He’s a guinea-pig, damn it. It happens to be extremely easy to trap a guinea-pig under a bucket, and it’s hilarious to watch a bucket-covered cavy scuttle across the floor and bang into walls.
Tumble Drier. Don’t even bloody ask about that, or she will freaking go PMS on your ass. TD is a flying pony with one of the most eye-bleedingly awful colour schemes ever. She’s very lucky, however. This means that she unwittingly manages to dodge most of Max’s schemes without realising it at the time.
TD is the tallest and most powerful out of the four characters I’m introducing today, but that doesn’t mean she’s able to control the others. Hell no. Max’s favourite way of annoying her is to leap onto her back and ride her like a normal horse, which she resents, and even though she bucks hard enough to dislodge anyone else, Max seems to be nigh on impossible to get rid of.
And finally, we come to Lint. He’s named Lint because of the fluffy mane down his spine. Someone once said it felt like the inside of their pocket, so he’s been named Lint ever since.
His wings are surprisingly powerful despite their size, and dragon magic probably has something to do with it too, so he can fly a lot better than Max. He’s smaller, too, so he’s more agile than Tumble Drier… oh, and he also breathes fire.
“Everyone’s all like, ‘oohh, baby dragons are sooo cute, when they breathe fire they cough out smoke and tiny little match-flames’. So that’s the point when I roast ‘em. They generally stop talking… and moving… after that.”
These characters will be made into a comic pretty damn soon. I already have three pages done and coloured. I’m supposed to have other people helping me, but if they don’t GET A MOVE ON with what they said they’d do A FEW MONTHS AGO then I’ll start without them.
